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News & Views of Phillips Since 1976
Friday April 4th 2025

On the Evolution of Lampreys*

from the Series Raise Your Voice…

By PETER MOLENAAR

A picture of the author with a black face mask reading 'Solidarity'
Peter Molenaar

When pondering the glory of biological evolution, one must at least acknowledge the appearance of intelligent design, that is, the intervention of an unseen “higher power”. Those who believe that consciousness is a product of the evolution of matter are not exempt from this consideration, even as a theologian must pose the question: whence the parasitic lamprey?

SCIENTISTS AND THEOLOGIANS UNITE!

It was not so terribly long ago; that the original planktonic mix gave birth to some zillion critters with the advantage of bilateral symmetry. Eventually, this massive genomic potentiality would render us the echinoderms with their exoskeletons and radial symmetry (think starfish, sea urchins, etc.). Fun fact: the larval stage of all echinoderms retains the original bilateral symmetry.


Perhaps every school child is familiar with the fossilized remains of the crinoid, species of which exist to this day. Crinoids, a type of echinoderm, are the source of the little calcareous circles found within layer upon layer of our limestone cliffs. The living crinoid was, in part, an assemblage of these disks which formed a tube topped with feathery appendages which served both respiration and the filter feeding mode. Hopefully, an aspiring biologist from this Neighborhood will pursue the hypothesis that such appendages were the precursor to the gills deployed by our fish. Was it not the paedogenesis of crinoid larvae which gave birth to us all?

Lamprey mouth. Photo: T. Lawrence, Great Lakes Fishery Commission


Remember amphioxus! Amphioxus was an original in our line of existence (phylum Chordata). It was a cartilaginous notochord which sustained the bilateralism, which ultimately evolved its vertebrate likeness: the lamprey (subphylum Vertebrata). It seems the original lamprey was sucking the guts from crinoid stalks before other fish evolved to provide meals of blood.

Meanwhile…

In her apartment a few miles south of Lake Street on Bloomington Avenue, a friend clings to an untenable existence, as her auto-immune disorder manifests as degenerative arthritis. Assisted living beckons, but the required Medicaid is uncertain. The Age of High Anxiety is upon us!


By what design did the lamprey spirit prevail within our nation’s oligarchy? Evidently, Satan is the cause of it.

Editor’s Note: Lampreys are a group of jawless fish comprising the order Petromyzontiformes. The adult lamprey is characterized by a toothed, funnel-like sucking mouth. Lampreys are ancient, eel-shaped, parasitic fish that use their suction mouth and sharp teeth to attach to other fish and suck their blood and body fluids. They are particularly known for their destructive impact on fish populations in the Great Lakes, where they are considered an invasive species.

Peter Molenaar advocates a broad united-front, even as he describes socialism as the future solution.

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